Is God Good?

Many Christians who have suffered from severe depression have found themselves beginning to question if God is actually good. We may wonder how a loving, gracious God could allow such unrivalled suffering, and not end it instantly by His power.

During the blackest phase of depression, I kept reminding myself that God was faithful, but as the days dragged into weeks and months with no improvement in sight, I despaired and wrote diary entries like this:

27th March 1990 – How will I ever trust You again? I’ll have a great confidence that every time I go through a major crisis, You’ll do nothing, You’ll say nothing, You’ll do nothing…I know You are Faithful and True, I know You can do anything You want. I know it’s Your will to heal all who are sick or under Satan’s power. I know You love us and want to help us…and I know that You will help me out of this nightmare one day…But why oh why do You tarry so long…what DO YOU WANT FROM ME!”

One problem is our modern mindset - we have forgotten what it means to wait. We have become impatient, expecting instant service, instant dinners, fast food restaurants, fast internet connection, motorised transport, and so on. We apply this same thinking to our sufferings, forgetting that God works according to His timetable, not ours. When we do not get want we want from God as quickly as we desire it, typical reactions may be to question, doubt, grumble or complain.

Some who are suffering from depression accuse God of treating humanity like a science experiment. They compare us to ants, struggling to overcome obstacles and sufferings placed deliberately in our way by an impersonal, uncaring God as He conducts experiments upon us.

Speaking for myself, I have always liked ants. Since I could walk, I would study them for hours. In my late twenties, I bought an ant farm and placed a pregnant queen-ant in it. Within two years, I had a thriving ant colony on my hands. I fed them, gave them water, and cared for them as treasured pets.

One day a savage summer heatwave caused every ant in my little colony to die of dehydration. Their passing saddened me, but as they were just ants, I put the matter behind me and got on with my life.

Now is that what God did with us? When Adam and Eve rebelled against God in the Garden of Eden, resulting in the death of their spirits, did He shrug His shoulders and say, “Oh, that’s too bad, but they’re only something I created. I’ll forget about them and do something else now.”

No, that was not God’s reaction at all. In fact, the Bible tells us that God loves us so much, that even before He created the Earth, Jesus had already been chosen to save humankind from itself.

For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your forefathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect. He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake. Through him you believe in God, who raised him from the dead and glorified him, and so your faith and hope are in God. 1 Peter 1:18-21

Although I had cared for my ants and did not want them to suffer and die, I would never have considered becoming one of them, taking their sufferings upon myself, and dying in their place so that they could live.

Yet that is what God did for us. God Himself, in the person of Jesus Christ, upon seeing our plight (which we brought upon ourselves through deliberate disobedience) laid aside His divine glory, become a human, suffered and died in our place so that we could be restored to Him. How much more proof do we need that God is good and truly loves us! Here are some Bible verses where God demonstrates His love for us through the atoning death of Jesus.

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
Philippians 2:6-8

I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20

He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. 1 Thessalonians 5:10

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16


That God is not good, faithful and trustworthy is an age-old attack that Satan has been throwing at humans since the dawn of creation. This is the very attack-strategy he used against Eve in the Garden of Eden.

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?" The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.' " "You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." Genesis 3:1-5

Satan tried to convince Eve that God was holding back on her, that He could not be trusted. Eve decided to listen to the Satan, the great deceiver, instead of holding to God’s Word and trusting that He was telling the truth.

“The doubt concerning God’s goodness, as Oswald Chambers so trenchantly put it, is the real root of sin. Embedded like splintered glass at the core of our souls is the suspicion that God does not have our best interests at heart. Unless that issue is exposed and dealt with, our hearts will never be truly pure.” Every Day with Jesus, Jul/Aug 2000, Fri 4 Aug, by Selwyn Hughes, CWR.

Let us be mindful that Satan deliberately attacks us when we are down – he targets those suffering with depression and whispers lies into our minds, trying to convince us that God is not good, that He is not faithful and trustworthy.

All of these lies were thrown at me while depressed, but this is the conclusion I reached:

20th July 90 –
I hate being so irritable and frustrated, so disturbed,
All day, every day.
And it never ends.
Oh Lord, where are You?
I feel like getting so angry with You.
I guess it all boils down to this: Is He trustworthy or not?
I know the answer is yes.

In time, I did make a complete recovery from depression, and the Lord blessed me with a fulfilling and fruitful life. During my recovery from depression, He drew me closer to Him, showed me how to rely upon His strength, and set me free from bondages and fears that had ensnared me for decades.

Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him. Psalm 34:8

Now I am the first to acknowledge that circumstances do not always turn out as we expect, but we need to keep things in perspective. We Christians are travellers passing through this world on our way to heaven. The sufferings we endure here pale into insignificance compared to the glories and blessings that await us in heaven. Most of all, they pale into grey when compared to the riches of having an eternal relationship with our loving God and Creator.

You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
Psalm about who is there to compare to You?
Psalm 73:24-25

All verses from the NIV.

Special Announcement

I would like to invite all of this blog’s readers to join my other blog www.inscribedinstone.blogspot.com on a journey to get to know (to be acquainted with by experience) the Lord Jesus Christ, through studying the Bible. My life’s passion - my greatest desire – is to know Jesus Christ. Not to know about Him, but to know Him intimately, as my Saviour, best friend, God, Lord, creator, King, brother, the lover of my soul.

Shattered Dreams

It can be very difficult to cope with the destruction of our plans and dreams for the future, especially if we believed those plans had come from God in the first place. Shock, denial, confusion, anger, and even descent into depression are common reactions.

On the other hand, the onset of depression can also destroy our plans for the future, which in turn makes depression worse.

Some Christians blame God for allowing those plans and dreams to be shattered. Others, doubting God’s goodness, accuse Him of destroying those plans deliberately.

I stand amongst those whose plans for the future were destroyed by depression. When I was nineteen, I felt a strong burden for the Asian peoples and spent the next five years preparing to go to Thailand as a pastor and missionary. I went to Bible College, helped plant a local church, and went to Thailand on a missionary orientation course. The plan for 1990 was additional Bible college studies and more church planting experience.

It was at that point in my life that depression overwhelmed me. As the days turned to weeks and then months, with no sign of the unbelievably intense suffering abating, I had no choice but to quit the ministry and abandon my plans for the future.

Yet having been convinced that God had called me to be a missionary in Asia, forsaking that dream left me terribly confused and wracked with guilt. I remember wondering during those dark months how Jesus viewed me, was He displeased and disappointed in me for making that decision? As I pondered this and my horrific condition, I began to get angry with Him, as you can see from this diary entry.

8th February 1990 – ‘Jesus cannot blame me for throwing in all thoughts of the ministry. He would have known that I would give up after going through all this - so He can’t blame me for pulling out. Also, I would have been heading for Thailand, doing Bible college etc right now, if all this stuff had not happened. So if Jesus wanted me to be a missionary, then He would not have or (should not have) let all this happen to me. But the truth is, all this has happened to me, but why? Where has it come from?’

Due to counselling and prayer, I eventually realised that I had made the mistake of placing my faith and trust in obediently following the path that I believed God had set for me. In fact, I became terrified of making a wrong step in the erroneous belief that this would destroy His plans for my life.

Such faulty thought processes had placed me in a fearful bondage. We are not to place our faith in the path we believe God has called us to follow - we are to place our faith and trust in God Himself. As to fearing I could destroy God’s plans for my life, God tells us to follow His precepts as presented in His word, and that He will never leave or forsake us. "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:20.

Let us have a look at Proverbs 3:5. ‘Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.’

I learnt that we must not place our hope in our understanding of how our future will turn out. For if we do, when things do not turn out as we expect them to, this may shake our life’s foundations. We are to build our lives upon Christ, the Cornerstone, the sure foundation – we must not build our lives upon our own understandings of what the future will be.

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9

There is a saying in the military. “No battle plan survives contact with the enemy.” There is a great lesson to learn here – not only do plans encounter resistance, but calculated or random events alter their course too. We must expect this and be flexible. When things do not turn out as we were expecting, trust in God instead of fearing, doubting, or blaming Him. God is in control, and uses all things for good for those who love Him.

Romans 8:28 says, ‘And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.’

Now it turns out that God did indeed give me a burden for the Asian peoples. But His plan for my life was not to be a missionary in Thailand planting churches. Instead, He led me to marry a Japanese girl and serve Him in a Japanese Christian church in my city. I had made plans, but God determined my steps. Letting go of the fears that depression had destroyed God’s plan for my life, I acknowledged Him with each step I took and He led me down a straight path.

In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:6

(On a side note, for those situations where sin, backsliding, waywardness or rebellion against God appears to have destroyed our future, there is still cause for hope. We need to return to God, confess our sins to Him, and turn our back upon those sins. God will forgive us and restore our relationship with Him. Although consequences of our prior actions may send our life in an undesired or unexpected direction, God is still with us. Please read about the prodigal son returning to God in Luke 15:11-32.)

We must place our faith, hope and trust in God our Father and in Christ our Lord, for ‘He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.’ Psalm 23:3 And then whatever path He leads us down, what ever storm He leads us through, even if our dreams for the future are shattered in the process, we will respond by clinging to, relying on, and trusting in Him, instead of responding with shock, confusion and anger.

John 14:1 “Let not your hearts be troubled, trust in God, trust also in Me.”

All verses from NIV.

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Paula's Testimony

It is my honour to share in this post a moving and very practical testimony about depression by Paula Wiseman.

For Worse, Then Better: My Battle

Genuine love prompts action, and it was love for my husband and my children that initiated one of the most unnerving and rewarding experience of my life – seeking treatment for depression. Doing the hard work of uncovering and dealing with the triggers and manifestations of the disease has resulted not just in a journey toward healing, but in a deepening of my relationships with those closest to me.

The first step, the “easier said than done” step, was admitting there was an issue. I knew I lived with recurring episodes, but I was sure that, in time, I could reason the depression away. It was simply a matter of finding the right book or article with all the answers.

The answers came in a most unexpected way. I attended a Women of Faith conference and listened to Sheila Walsh talk openly about her battle with depression. I took away one important fact- treatment works.

That said, it was not necessarily cut and dried. It was a process of seeing a doctor, taking medication, changing medication, changing doctors, and adding a therapist. Had it not been for my family and that desire to be well for their sakes as much as my own, I would not have hung in there. Now I have first-hand knowledge that treatment does work.

Treatment started long before I reached the doctor’s office, though. It started with finally trusting my husband enough to be honest with him. I stopped saying, “I’m fine,” and admitted I was struggling.

When my husband and I first married, he knew very little about depression. He knew that there was something going on with me, but he did not know what questions to ask and I did not love him or trust him enough to volunteer anything. For ten years, we lived with this uneasy arrangement of denial, frustration and misunderstanding.

Once I saw a doctor and we began to deal with depression, we could see how it was affecting me and how it insinuated itself in our marriage. Depression is an isolating, alienating condition. It warps perception and judgment but the sufferer is rarely aware of it. When I thought I was being self-reliant, I was in fact pushing my husband away. What I called inner strength was nothing more than self-deception.

As we unmasked depression, I became more open, and more willing to risk trusting my husband. He once remarked that, from his perspective, depression had gotten worse in the last few years. I assured him it was the opposite. The episodes were shorter, and much less intense, and I was able to function through them to an increasing extent. What had changed was that I felt safe and secure enough to let him see it, and to see me at my worst.

Some people have a fear of rejection. I was less afraid and more resigned to rejection. Sooner or later, I was sure it would come, regardless of the relationship. It was just a matter of time. My husband showed me otherwise. He is a wonderful, understanding, longsuffering man. I always knew that. What I did not understand, what I still need a reminder of periodically, is that he loves me unconditionally. I had always felt unworthy of him, because I was “defective” and he was not. He was perfect, while I was a pretender.

I still think he is perfect, and he smiles when I say that, but we both know that things have leveled between us. I know that the love I give him is precious because of how much he values me as a person. The love I receive is no longer such a desperate need, and I can simply soak it in. There is no fear that he will figure me out, that the truth about me will be too much, and that he will abandon me.

Because my husband loved me, even after he knew my battles, I was willing to take that same chance with others. I risked being vulnerable and open with a few of my close friends, and was rewarded with some deep, very secure relationships.

Another benefit is being on the “giving” end of the relationship. Depression is intensely self-centered, and it taxes all those relationship bonds. I was in constant crisis, in need of a listening ear, perpetually irritated that no one understood what I was going through. Then after the crisis passed, I felt guilty for always having some difficulty I needed to unload, and ashamed that I could not cope when it seemed everyone else could.

I found out the truth is, none of us is perfect, and we all need a little support from time to time. My friends did not resent helping me out any more than I felt put upon when they called. We all learned to appreciate each other for our strengths as well as our weaknesses.

The ironic thing is that my friendships and my marriage are stronger after I have owned up to my depression. No one could have convinced me that would have happened before I sought treatment.

Getting to this point required a huge step in learning how to communicate. Open, honest communication is necessary in any relationship and it is critical in a marriage. Simple, yes. Easy, no. It took quite a bit of ‘unlearning’ on my part. I was used to overanalyzing and second-guessing everything my husband said, and the answers I gave him were vague and veiled, never lies, but worlds away from the truth.

I discovered that straightforward requests reap tremendous benefits. ‘Can I sort this out for a couple of days by myself before we talk about it?’ takes the pressure off me, and keeps his imagination from getting out of hand. Strange as it sounds, during a depression episode, deciding what to cook for dinner is a particularly paralyzing decision. Since I disclosed that, my husband is careful to suggest something or opt for eating out.

We found one statement that revolutionized our talks. ‘I hear the words you are saying, and I think this is what you mean, but this is how it comes across.’ It was a non-threatening way to show him how I process things. I knew he was trying to help and told him so, but I did not pretend when it was not.

We have also accepted the exasperating fact that words can have a completely different impact when I am depressed than they would otherwise. He has asked reasonable questions, looking for information. ‘Did you wash the whites?’ During an episode that became an indictment. I had not lived up to expectations. I was a failure. I cannot explain why I think that way, but I must admit that I do occasionally.

When I let my husband in on that, he became an ally and my chief encourager. He is quick to notice what I am able to get done during an episode, and he wordlessly covers what I do not. I depend on his judgment, and I trust him to tell me when things are slipping. I put just as much stock in it when he tells me how things have improved.

The most gratifying thing is how willing he has been to do the hard work that living with depression has required. All the work I have done trying to understand the disease, to reorder my thought processes and my reactions to situations, has been met by equally hard work on his part. By taking on this challenge, we have each communicated to the other, ‘you are worth it’, in a way neither of us grasped before.

© Paula Wiseman and Sage Words, 2009.

Signposts

I had been suffering from severe depression for just over three months when I wrote this. Although feelings of despair dominate the diary entry, threads of hope are also woven through it.

25th March 1990 -
Will I Ever See Daylight Again?
I feel like a bird trapped in a small birdcage,
A birdcage hidden at the bottom of a dark basement.
And all I want to do is break out of the blackness,
And fly into the Sonlight which waits outside.
I can feel it, the Light –
It’s all around the basement.
The Light is greater than the basement.
All I want to do is get into that Light,
And loose myself in it.
But it is an impossible task – I can’t get out.
And the thick, murky black air closes in…

I feel like I’m in a room with invisible walls.
But it’s so black in the room,
That I can’t see through the walls.
And I am the centre of the room.
Where I go, the room goes – I can’t get out.
I wish someone would chain the room still,
So I could get out into the Light outside.

There must be Light outside! I can remember it!
And other people I see everyday walk in it.
But how do I get out?
How do I get to the Light?

Oh Jesus, You are the Light of the world.
Please shatter this darkened prison I live in,
And take me into Your light.
Let it consume me, encompass me, surround me.
Let me become one with You, You in me, me in You.

Will this nightmare ever end?
Those who have been here before me,
Have left sign posts along the way,
Showing the way out.
But they all say the same thing:
“Wait, you’ll come through it,
it doesn’t feel like it now,
but you will come through it.
Life will be normal again one day.”

In time Jesus did shatter the dark prison walls that had trapped me for so long. As I trudged along that forlorn track He lead me to signpost after signpost, each nudging me in the right direction, towards being able to cope with depression and finally overcome it.

And now, twenty years after I wrote the above, I am one of those ‘others’ who, having recovered from depression, is leaving signposts along the way for others to follow – and that is the whole purpose of this blog.

And here are some of those signposts…

Although our life may appear to be a complete mess and out of control, this is not the truth.


We need to break depression’s fear, flight, fight cycle in order to reduce the flow of negative adrenalin. It is ironic that in order to do this, we need to accept the very sensations that are disturbing us, since the act of fearing, fleeing or fighting depression and its symptoms/causes is what causes the adrenalin to flow. (1)


Instead of desperately wanting to escape depression and its disturbing symptoms, we need to be willing to live with them by being content whatever our circumstances.


When we accept and learn to live with depression and its symptoms, and let time pass, the flow of adrenalin begins to diminish, and as it diminishes, the symptoms lose their intensity, shorten in duration, and slowly begin to disappear.


And the good news is that we do not need to do this alone or through our own strength.



All verses from NIV.

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(1) Signposts 2, 3, and 4 inspired by ‘Self Help for Your Nerves,’ Doctor Claire Weekes, Angus & Robertston Publishers, 1989, p19.

Will This Nightmare Ever End?

One of the worst aspects of depression is the fear that it will never end. I often wrote of that fear in my diary.

25th March 1990 –
Will this nightmare ever end?

12th April ’90 –
What is this storm that rages within me?
Why won’t it abate, why won’t it subside?
It comes in like a storm, and devours me.
And it won’t go away. It’s near four months now.
Four months of doing nothing, just hiding, hiding, and waiting.

3rd July 1990 –
I just want to get on with my life.
Will I ever be me again?

20th July 90 -
I hate being so irritable and frustrated, so disturbed,
All day, every day.
And it never ends.
Oh Lord, where are You?
I feel like getting so angry with You.
I guess it all boils down to this: Is He trustworthy or not?
I know the answer is yes.
But why does He make me wait so long.

Yet at the same time, I had a faint hope that the nightmare would end one day, that there was light at the end of the tunnel.

15th May 90 –
But each day comes to an end eventually,
And so will this emotional turmoil.

18th May 90 –
How I long to be normal again,
As I believe this will all end one day.
The recovery will be slow, I think.
It needs to be, I couldn't cope with anything quick.
I'm beginning to see some hope for the future,
Which is good I guess.


One Saturday in 1990, when I was feeling very low, my mother said, “Don’t just sit around moping, you need to do something. Why don’t you go and do a painting, like you used to.”

I took her advice, sat down, and without any goal in mind, painted this painting. I guess it was a subconscious attempt to show how I was feeling, that I was stuck in a dark cave. High in the cave was a small opening through which I could see sunlight, which was mockingly beyond my reach. Yet when I showed the painting to my mother, she smiled and said, “See, there is light at the end of the tunnel. You will get out of this, you will recover.”

And she was right. I did get out of the hopeless, dark pit. I learnt how to cope with depression and live a fulfilling life while letting depression and its symptoms churn away in the background like background music - background music that slowly faded away over time as I slowly healed. And I eventually recovered from depression competely.

The purpose of this post is just to encourage anyone stuck in the miry pit of depression that there is light at the end of the tunnel, the nightmare does end.

However, we must not wait passively for this to happen. Depression is an illness, and like any other illness, needs to be treated. So we need to seek sound medical advice and seriously consider taking medication if recommended, see a Christian therapist or counsellor on a regular basis so that the underlying issues that causes the depression can be treated.

We also need to understand the fear-adrenalin-fear cycle and learn the steps we can take to break that cycle.
the fear-adrenalin-fear cycle
breaking the cycle

And of course, we need to be patient and give our exhausted nervous system and mind the time they need to heal.

Most of all, we need to place unwavering trust in God, recognising that He is with us and is in control, instead of letting our hearts be troubled. We need to rely upon Christ’s strength in our weakness, rather than stagger along with what little remains of our own strength.

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. 1 Peter 5:10

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

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All verses from the NIV.

What Stopped me from Ending it?

The extract below is from my diary, written while stuck in the miry pit of severe depression. I had virtually no hope, could see no future, and feared depression would never end.

29th April 1990 -
How many other people are out there like me?
I wish I could help them, comfort them,
But I wouldn’t know how.
I don’t even know how to survive myself.
What was it that stopped me from ending it all?
Why did I persist?
Jesus was some of the reason, sure,
But even my spiritual life was in a complete shambles.

The one main thing that stopped me from ending it was my mother.
I had to keep going for her,
And for the others who cared for me.
How could they cope if I had killed myself?
I saw the devastating effects a suicide could have on a family,
And there’s no way I could put others through such an ordeal.

A common reaction if experiencing unbearable suffering such as depression, is to want to die or kill ourselves. Unable to see an end to the suffering, and not knowing how to be free from it, suicide or wanting to die may seem like the only escape route available.

This is a lie from Satan. Capitalising upon our fears and feelings of hopelessness, Satan tries to convince suffering people that death is the only way out. He tries to hide the truth from us because he wants to destroy us. We must not give into Satan; we must not give him the victory.

John 8:44 “the devil…was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”

Another extract from my diary, 14th June 1990 –
I keep asking myself, why am I still here?
Why am I still even trying?
Why don’t I just give up and end it?
I mean, is this all there is to human life?
Suffering?
Is this it?

But regardless of how hard it gets,
I can’t end it, for my mother could not handle it.
I’ve seen the effects suicide can have on a family,
And I would not willingly do that to anyone.
I feel so like Job. “Curse God and die!” my thoughts yell at me.
“Look at this suffering!
How can He be faithful,
When He’s apparently done nothing for six whole months now –
Curse Him and die!”
But God is faithful, and I know that -
It is His name – Faithful and True.

The main thing that stopped me from ending it was that I had witnessed the effects suicide has upon a person’s family, and I loved my family too much to destroy their lives by ending my own. They loved me, cared for me, and were supporting me the best they could, as were my friends. If I had taken my own life, it would have destroyed their lives by causing them to enter a depression worse than what I was experiencing. I refused to put them through that.

And as to the fear that depression would never end – that was a lie as well. I did recover. The fact is, if I had succumbed to Satan’s lies that death was the only way out of depression, I would have been robbed of all the wonderful blessings that God was yet to give me.

1 Corinthians 2:9
However, as it is written:
"No eye has seen,
no ear has heard,
no mind has conceived
what God has prepared for those who love him."

Once I came to understand how depression worked and how to recover, hope re-entered my life. During the next four years, while I slowly healed, I learnt to live with it and got on with my life. I made a lot of new friends, took up new hobbies such as writing and computer games, and joined a new church where I played the piano and taught Sunday school.

And then, when I recovered from depression, God continued to pour His blessings upon me. I bought a house, married a wonderful lady and had two beautiful (busy!) children.

Quality of life after depression was also much better than it had been before depression. Why? Because it was through depression that had I finally learnt how to deal with anxiety and panic attacks – I was finally free of them for the first time in my life! And best of all, I came to receive a much deeper understanding of God’s love for me, I learnt how to trust Him during difficult times, and I came so much closer to Jesus.

Another thing that helped me to press on, where the memories of my relationship with Jesus before I became depressed. I often reflected upon the times He had comforted me, the times I had felt His wonderful presence, and upon Bible passages that offered encouragement. Most of all, I remembered when Jesus so clearly revealed His love for me - a love so deep and touching that I had wept for joy afterwards. I focused on the fact that God is faithful and true, irrespective of my circumstances.

Ephesians 3:17-19 ‘And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.’

One thought that helped me persevere was the joy of reaching heaven and hearing Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!” Matthew 25:23. How could Jesus say that if I had taken my own life? That is not being a good and faithful servant, making the most of the life and gifts He had given me – that is giving up!

I also kept in mind that God rewards the overcomers, those who persevere in times of trouble. The book of Revelation lists several wonderful rewards that Christ gives to the overcomers. If you have a moment, please check them out. Revelation 2:7, 2:11, 2:17, 3:5, 3:12

In conclusion, if plagued by thoughts that suicide is the only way out of depression, remember that this is a lie - there is a way out, we can recover, and we can enjoy the richness of life again.

And some advice - we need to talk to those who are supporting and caring for us, and tell them if we are having suicidal thoughts. When I confided to my mother that I felt like ending it all, she immediately arranged for me to see her doctor. The anti-depressants the doctor gave me were very effective in reducing the severity of depression’s symptoms, which made life much more bearable. So if having such thoughts, please see a good doctor and follow his or her advice.

As well as seeing a doctor, we need to get help from a professional therapist or counsellor and deal with the underlying issues that are causing the depression. I also recommend reading “Self Help for Your Nerves” by Dr Claire Weekes. It was after reading this book that hope returned to my life.

And most of all, we need to cling to, rely upon, and trust in Jesus. He will not abandon us if we turn to Him.

If no one is available and you need to talk about suicidal thoughts, please talk to someone at a suicide helpline. Here is a helpful listing of such helplines available in a number of different countries.

All verses from the NIV.

Depression and Regular Physical Exercise

Learning karate in my late teens was not one of my best decisions. Although I never got into a fight, karate still had a profound impact upon my worldview. Perhaps I was just too immature, for I eventually realised that rather than being ready to reach out to others with Christ’s love and compassion, I was walking the streets and university always ready to defend myself, should the need ever arise.

Yet the biggest problem I encountered with the karate style that I was learning was that it was intertwined with eastern religious principles and philosophies. Being a Christian, I took care to avoid those influences as I worked my way towards black belt. For example, when our instructor held a transcendental meditation session, I sat in the circle and watched instead of participating. While they chanted “Ohm,” I prayed to the Lord. When the session was over, the instructor turned to me disapprovingly and said, “I didn't sense anything from you.” Duh, was my unspoken response, but to him I said, “That's because I don't agree with it.”

Finally, after many months of arduous training it was time for my black belt grading. The grading required that I participate in a Buddhist/Shinto Senjo ceremony. I praise the Lord for choosing that exact moment in my life to drop a wonderful book on to my lap, “The Hidden Dangers of the Rainbow.” This book revealed the manipulative influences of the New Age Movement as it carefully infiltrates Western society with eastern religious influences. My eyes were opened and I realised that as a Christian, I could not participate in such a ceremony. Therefore, I quit karate instead of doing the black belt grading.

However, doing karate for two years had good points as well, the main one being that through it I achieved a very high level of physical fitness, which had very positive effects upon every area of my life. During those two years my energy levels peaked, my mind became more flexible and alert, my immune system became stronger than ever before, and if I did get sick, I recovered very quickly. I changed emotionally as well – I was more confident, motivated, inspired, and full of purpose.

Now although I knew that karate’s regular workouts had brought about these amazing changes in my life, after I quit karate I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Instead of searching for another avenue of physical exercise without an eastern religious component, I stopped exercising altogether.

As to be expected, over the next four years my health steadily returned to what it had been previously. I caught every sickness I encountered, they hit me hard, my mind lost its flexibility, my energy reserves ran out and it was a struggle to make it through each day. Admittedly, after I graduated from Bible College I did far too much, working fulltime as well as being an assistant pastor, yet that was compounded by my lack of health due to partaking in no regular physical exercise.

I realised my mistake in 1990, while still severely depressed, and slowly started getting back into regular exercise. Initially I went jogging and did (lots!) of sit-ups, and then in 1991 when well on the road to recovery from depression, I joined a gym. At first I did weights and circuit. Circuit was fun, very energetic and a great cardiovascular workout. On the other hand, since my mind had nothing to do while pumping iron, doing weights saw me struggling with fearful churning thoughts. Yet all the same, I noticed that my quality of life was slowly improving on all levels.

In 1992, I changed from doing weights and circuit to doing aerobics three times a week. Aerobics proved to be a fantastic workout for the entire body, and even helped with my mental problems. I recall going to an aerobics class while in the midst of a panic attack on several occasions, only to be pleasantly surprised when the brisk exercise to music drove the attack away.

Having learnt my lesson, twenty years later I am still doing aerobics, as well as light hand weights at home several nights a week. Being physically fit helps all areas of our lives. It can boost our immune system, reduces the effects of illnesses upon us, strengthens our bodies and helps prevent injuries, makes our minds more flexible and alert, boosts our confidence, lifts our emotions, and even improves our spiritual condition.

I encourage everyone to partake in regular physical exercise. A word of caution, though - if you are out of shape, take it slowly, one-step at a time. Start by going on three or four gentle 45-minute walks a week. After a few weeks of this, change this to brisk walks. Consider joining a pilates class and improve your flexibility. In addition, depending upon your age and level of fitness, consider embracing more energetic forms of exercise such as swimming, aerobics, bike riding, or jogging. Joining a gym can be very helpful as the classes they run provide motivation for those who find it hard to motivate themselves. Gymnasiums also have exercise bikes, treadmills, steppers, rowing machines, and weights.

Another word of caution - depending upon our age and level of fitness, it is worthwhile getting a check-up with a doctor before determining a suitable form of regular physical exercise. Doing too much exercise or unsuitable exercise could cause injuries. If joining a gym, book yourself in for a physical assessment before joining any classes or doing any weights, and the instructor will design a program especially suited for you. (A small footnote here, please avoid yoga – its roots and purposes are inseparably bound with eastern religious philosophies, something that is deliberately hidden from Westerners.)

Another important aspect of maintaining our physical health is a good diet, eating plenty of vegetables and fruit and drinking about eight cups of water a day. (If our health deteriorates upon such a diet, see a doctor immediately. Some people are fructose or gluten intolerant, and a healthy diet can cause depression in such a case. )

Gary R. Collins, Ph.D. shares the following advice for preventing depression, “Encourage physical fitness. Since poor diet and lack of exercise can make people depression-prone, people should always be encouraged – by word and example – to take care of their bodies. A healthy body is less susceptible to mental as well as to physical illness.” Christian Counselling, Word Publishing, 1980.

‘Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.’ 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

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All verses from the NIV.

Occupy Till I Come

This post follows on from my previous post, where I explained that we must not let depression isolate us. We need to spend time with close family or friends and join a caring Christian community.

In this post, I discuss something else that played a significant role in helping me to cope with and recover from depression. Can you see from the diary extract below something that helped dull depression’s intensity?

28th Feb 1990 –
But those two weeks haunt me.
They do not make sense.
The first one ended after eight days,
But I knew it was the eye of the storm.
Sure enough, two weeks later – blam!
And this second week lasted six intense days,
And it never finished.
It is still going, nine weeks later.
But it is not as bad as it was then.
But that’s probably because I’m busy at work.
As soon as I start to look, I start to sink and say,
“What’s happened to me. I can’t believe what’s happened to me.”

As mentioned in my previous post, severe depression had left be bedridden for six days as terrifying fears immobilised me – a phase that only ended when my parents returned from a week’s holiday. My mother had bundling me off that bed busied me with menial chores around the home, as well as providing me with much needed support.

Two days later I had to return to work. My mind was still lost in a miry pit of churning fearful thoughts and I did not want to work, nevertheless, I refused to shirk my responsibilities and risk losing my job. So off to work I went, and as you can see from the diary entry above, being busy at work dulled depression’s intensity.

That is an important aspect of coping with and recovering from depression – keeping ourselves gainfully engaged in constructive activities. This could be a full time, part time or casual job. If this is not possible, we could volunteer to help a charity, such as the Salvation Army or an opportunity shop. We could even offer to work free in the church office a couple of days a week, or volunteer to help a family member who runs a business.

Paid or volunteer work done weekly gives us purpose, a routine, and it keeps our mind busy on things other than the fearful thoughts that demand out attention.

I know that this can be hard to do, but Jesus is there to help us take this step.

‘I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.’ Philippians 4:13 KJV.

On many occasions, my wife and I visited a Japanese lady, Chika Honda, in the Deer Park Metropolitan Women's Correctional Centre. In October 2000, the government took over management of the prison. While this transfer of management was being implemented, the inmates were placed in a state of lockdown where they could not leave their self-contained units. Chika asked our church to pray that the lockdown would be ended as soon as possible so that she could go back to work in the prison’s workshops. Being stuck all day in a unit with other inmates with nothing to do was unbearable, whereas the job gave her a sense of purpose and achievement.

Please note that we must not use activities such as a job to run from the causes of our depression. It is imperative to seek help from a Christian counsellor or Christian professional therapist to deal with the issues and fears that caused the depression in the first place.

Now let us have a look at Luke 19:13, where Jesus is seen giving gifts to His servants.

So he called ten of his servants and gave them ten minas. “Put this money to work,” he said, “until I come back.” Luke 19:13 NIV

God has given us all spiritual gifts with which to serve Him. Putting these gifts into action is another activity that assists with the recovery of depression. To focus on God, and on the needs of others, is a healing balm all of its own.

Acts 20:35 “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”

Before depression had destroyed my life, I had been an assistant pastor and a church musician. Ten months after my descent into depression, when it was clear that I was on the road to recovery, my counsellor pushed me back into ministry. At her advice, I started with something small – playing the piano in a home group. The next year I started teaching Sunday School as well. After I recovered from depression, I became much more involved in the life of my church.

Let’s take another look at Luke 19:13 So he called ten of his servants and gave them ten minas. “Put this money to work,” he said, “until I come back.” Luke 19:13 NIV

Yes, God has given us all spiritual gifts, but He has also given us natural talents, such as giftings with sport, music, writing, painting, gardening, and so on. God created us in His image, and He has placed a desire to be creative in each one of us. So let us also develop and pursue those talents, or hobbies, that God has given us – they are a gift from Him.

One of the greatest pieces of advice that helped me when I became severely depressed in early 1990 came from a friend who had also suffered from depression: “Find anything that you enjoy, and pursue it. Just try to have fun.”

“Have fun, when I’m like this?” I thought to myself, yet I pressed on and embraced my friend’s advice. I bought a computer, played engrossing computer games, and over the next five years wrote three novels as well as pursuing other hobbies. I even joined a gym. These hobbies helped to keep my mind productively occupied and were a significant factor in breaking my mind’s habit of thinking fearful thoughts.

Sherry Castelluccio, who suffered from severe post-partum depression after the birth of her daughter, offered this advice – “Are you bored at home? Pick up that hobby you put down. Are you lonely? Call that friend you haven’t spoken to in months. You will both be glad you did. Is your body physically sick? Go sit outside in the sun for a few minutes. Find the one thing that makes you smile and drink it up. Surround yourself with children, rent a comedy, finger paint. You are here because God put you here with a purpose. Find out what it is, make it your ambition to find out what you can do to bless others. I have found that the fastest way to bust Satan in the teeth is to do something for someone else. It puts a stop to the feelings of sadness and makes you feel alive and full of purpose, all at the same time. Make yourself laugh. It’s the simplest, most inexpensive cure there is and the most readily available. It changes your whole outlook.”

If you enjoy writing, may I recommend the excellent weekly Writing Challenge as run by Faithwriters? Check out their website for more details. Or, perhaps consider doing an online creative writing course.

I have always loved the way which the King James Version translates Luke 19:13 And he called his ten servants, and delivered them ten pounds, and said unto them, “Occupy till I come.”

What wonderful advice - keep ourselves productively occupied until He comes. So let us work as we are able, serve God with the spiritual gifts He has given us, and pursue an engaging hobby. Keeping occupied with such productive activities can be of great assistance in helping us to recover from depression by taking our focus off depression’s fears and symptoms that try so hard to immobilise us.

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(All verses from the NIV unless stated otherwise.)

It is Not Good for Man to be Alone

My descent into depression accelerated towards the end of 1989. Exhausted by chronic insomnia and frequent panic attacks, a massive shock finally pushed me over the edge. My mind unravelled to the extent that for the next several days, I did little else but lay on my bed, rocking from side to side as I tried in vain to pull myself out of the terrifying obsessive panic attacks.

I described that week, and an earlier similar one, in my diary, 28th Feb 1990 –
What’s happened to me?
Where has it come from?
What did those two weeks mean,
One after Thailand, one at the year’s end.
I fell apart emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually.
I could barely think a complete thought.
I could not find peace whatever course of action I considered.
All day long, during those two weeks, I lay curled up into a ball.
And I could not get away - it would not stop.

It is significant to note that my parents were absent during this week, having gone to attend an annual Christian convention. Fortunately, my brother was there. He made sure I kept eating and tried to help and support me in other ways.

When my parents returned a week later, upon finding me laying on my bed in that terrible condition, my mother sprang into action. She bundled me off that bed, encouraged me with kind words, and in no time sent me outside to wash my car, which was a very hard thing to do considering the state of my mind. Yet even so, I could not help but notice that the activity of washing the car lessened the inner pain slightly. She and my brother also came and prayed for me, and my mother continued to give me menial tasks to do every day such as watering the garden, helping serve dinner, and also encouraged me to watch TV with the family every evening. The fears assaulting my mind continued to scream at me while doing these things, yet I noticed the intensity of those fears was less during these times than when I was laying on my bed all day. The activities my mother gave me were a good distraction.

So it was because of my mother that I was able to get off that sickbed. Mostly, she was simply there for me. She never told me to snap out of it, never made any demands. This non-demanding, supportive human contact helped to pull me out of that blackest, unable-to-move phase of depression.

The Bible tells us that when God created Adam, He looked at him and said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” Genesis 2:18.

Although it is a normal reaction when depressed to want to hide from any human contact, this reaction is harmful. It is not good for someone who is depressed to be alone. We need to be with close family members or close friends who will simply be there for us, providing emotional support. We do not need to tell them what we are going through in detail - they probably would not understand anyway - just being with them helps a lot.

Not everyone has close family members they can turn to, and for those who are ill, disabled or living in the country, even finding friends can be difficult. In which case, here is some wonderful advice from Sherry Castelluccio. “Are you lonely? Call that friend you haven’t spoken to in months. You will both be glad you did.” Another option is to join a supportive Christian forum, such as The Cypress Times , a Christian social networking site, or the Faithwriters forum , where any Christian who dabbles in writing is welcome to socialise. (And if you are reading this blog, you probably dabble with writing too?)

Another very important source of human contact is available through a local church. Gary R. Collins, Ph.D. shares, “The church, and other social institutions, can become therapeutic communities where people feel welcome and accepted. A concerned group of people who have learned to be caring can do much to soften the trauma of crises and provide strength and help in times of need. Aware that they are not alone, people in crises are able to cope better and thus avoid severe depression.” Christian Counselling, Word Publishing, 1980.

Hebrews 10:24-25 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Please note that while small churches can provide caring, family-like atmospheres, this is noticeably absent from larger churches. If we are attending a larger church, it is imperative to join at least one of that church’s small groups, such as a women’s or men’s fellowship, home group (cell group), youth group, prayer group, and so on.

Around ten months after my descent into severe depression, when I had finally regained hope for the future, the Christian counsellor I was seeing encouraged me to stop hiding behind Jesus, join a home group, and get back into ministry, such as playing the piano in the home group I was to join.

I took her advice and joined a midweek home group run by a couple in my church. Having been lonely for so long because of depression, this midweek meeting soon became one of the highlights of my week. I played the piano for the group and made some good friends. It was wonderful to simply be with other believers and enjoy their company as we fellowshipped and worshipped God together. I did not tell anyone in the group that I was recovering from depression, but it may have been a good idea to share briefly what I was going through with the home group’s leader in order to receive prayer and pastoral care.

In conclusion, although depression seeks to isolate us, we must not allow it to do so. Spend time with close family or friends, and join a caring Christian small group as soon as we are able to do so. It is through the church, Christ’s body, that we can receive encouragement, support and strength.

1 Corinthians 14:26 What then shall we say, brothers? When you come together, everyone has a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation. All of these must be done for the strengthening of the church.

(All verses from the NIV)

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Robbing Those Disturbing Symptoms of Power

It was in 1996, at the age of thirty, when I began to suffer weird turns. Frequency varied from once in six weeks to almost daily when I was extremely fatigued or under a lot of stress.

These turns, which I labelled ‘spike attacks,’ were unlike anything I had experienced before. Here is an example of one.

I walked into the copy-room at work to file some bank statements. As I entered the room, a tremendous sense of deju vu overcame me – convincing me that this exact event had happened before in exactly the same way. Somehow, it was happening all over again. As my confused mind tried to understand how such a thing could be possible, a vision of crystal-clarity popped into my mind. I saw a scene from my past, a pair of tennis shoes beside a door. (A mundane vision accompanied each spike attack - once it was a garage door, another time a staircase in the Melbourne tennis centre.)

As the vision faded every single nerve ending in my body spiked with adrenalin – which felt like receiving a billion tiny electric shocks simultaneously. This was following by the sensation that I was falling helplessly down a very deep elevator shaft with my stomach leading the way. When the falling sensation ceased a moment later, my stomach snapped back up into place with an explosion of utter agony that felt like a thousand knives being plunged home. Then it was over, leaving me dazed and confused. I would turn to the Lord and cry out to Him in my mind, “Oh Jesus, that hurt so bad!” Several minutes of frantic reflection was required to convince myself the sense of déjà vu was wrong - I had not experienced this exact event before. These episodes only took several seconds but felt much longer.

I had no idea what these spike attacks were or where they were coming from. There were disturbing, disorientating, confusing, and painful, and I could have lived in fear of them and dreaded their return. They could have turned my life into a nightmare – but they did not.

I did not fear the spike attacks, nor worry about them happening again.

Psalm 46:1-3
God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
Selah

I was able to trust in God and have no fear of these attacks by putting into practice a technique that I had learnt from reading “Self Help for Your Nerves” by Dr Claire Weekes. In her book, Dr Weekes explained a very effective system of helping us not to fear depression’s distressing physical symptoms. By not fearing those symptoms, we rob them of their power. Depression typically inflicts its sufferers with a plethora of disturbing physical symptoms such as very bad shoulder or neck pain, aching jaw, tightness in the chest or stomach, heartburn, insomnia, missed or racing heartbeats, a prickling sensation in the limbs, and so on. (Note, the spike attacks were not caused by depression - more on that later…)

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

When I had a spike attack, instead of fearing it, I studied it analytically from the perspective of a curious observer, carefully studying each of its phases. I contemplated the visions to see if they had any significance, (they never did) and applied myself to the task of convincing myself that this experience had not happened before. Instead of fearing the return of these turns, when they occurred it was simply another chance to study them.

So the turns were terrible, painful and exhausting, but overall, a curiosity. I did not fear them at all. I accepted that they were part of life and kept on living as usual. My wife was the only person who could tell I was having an attack.

This same technique, when applied the depression’s distressing physical symptoms, also robs them of power by teaching us not to fear them. If you get a chance to read “Self Help for Your Nerves,” she explains this technique in detail in Chapter Six, Cure of the More Constant Symptoms. And for physical symptoms caused by depression, it can cure them, as my life can testify. Once we no longer fear those symptoms and are willing to live with them as background music to our day, the fear related adrenalin flow begins to reduce, causing the symptoms to grow weaker until they disappear completely.

So let us place our trust in the Lord and take refuge in Him, and fear not depression’s distressing symptoms. God will help us overcome such enemies that seek to destroy us through fear.

Psalm 27:1-3
The LORD is my light and my salvation -
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life -
of whom shall I be afraid?
When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh,
when my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will I be confident.

Back to the spike attacks – it was in 2002 that I discovered what they were – complex partial epileptic seizures (also known as temporal lobe epileptic seizures), confirmed by MRI and EEG scans. Anti-seizure meds have now stopped those seizures. But I praise God for showing me a practical way of learning not to fear the things that can go wrong in my mind and body. Although I suffered hundreds of seizures, I trusted in God instead of fearing them.

Isaiah 41:13 For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

(All verses from the NIV)

image from freeimages.co.uk

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Invisible Handicap

Below is an entry from my diary back in 1990. I wrote this about six weeks after reading “Self Help for Your Nerves” by Dr Claire Weekes. Finally, months of confusion had been replaced by understanding: I finally knew what was wrong with me, and had loads of practical advice to help me recover. Hope for the future had re-entered my life, but the journey towards full recovery was not yet over.

15th Sept 1990 -
The Invisible Handicap

I have a handicap - but no one can see it.
I am not like someone who is crippled, whose handicap everyone can see.
I am not like my friend, who was born with his fingers deformed.
But like them, I do have a major handicap.
My nervous system is over-sensitive, and has been so all my life.
For the past nine months, it has developed a nervous habit,
Of over manufacturing fear related adrenalin,
Causing physical and emotional side effects.
But no one knows, no one can see it - only the couple of people I have told.
Sometimes I wish I had a visible handicap, and then people would know -
Know what I feel like and what I'm suffering from.

I have managed to pinpoint the main area of conflict,
That manages to cause so many problems in me.
The conflict lies between what I think I can do,
And what I really can do.
Because I have a capable and analytical mind,
Which can visualize me doing many things,
Yet only now I have finally learnt,
That my emotional system is mega-sensitive -
Over-sensitive, in fact.
It bruises and bleeds so easily, and affects me in so many ways.
I never realised that all "these" things that happen to me,
Have all been caused by this one thing.
I did not realise anything was wrong, and kept going.
The other problem is my lack of physical energy,
My mind never considers it when pondering what to do.


Do you, or have you had, an invisible handicap? (Does not have to be depression, there are many ‘invisible’ handicaps that can afflict us.) Please feel free to share your experiences in the comments box below this article.

Depression is a very real handicap that affects every aspect of our lives – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

While still in depression’s early days, when I had no hope and everything seemed blacker than I could endure, I had to see our family doctor since the doctor who had placed me on anti-depressants had gone to live in the country. I gave the doctor a summary of what I was going through and asked for a repeat prescription.

He gave me the prescription, but his attitude was very condescending. He pointed out that the family who had been to see him prior to my appointment had two mentally challenged children. He said that this family had real problems and then left the sentence hanging – his unspoken point was that there was comparatively nothing wrong with me.

The doctor apparently had little idea about the effect depression can have upon our lives.

The above diary entry also shows when I finally learnt the difference between what I thought I could do, and what I could do. Since that time, I have been careful to pace myself.

On a positive note, my nervous system did not remain over-sensitive or “mega-sensitive.” I still have a tendency to be anxious, but nothing like before. While recovering from depression I learnt to rely upon Christ and His strength, instead of fighting and fearing what I was going through. John 14:1 became the theme verse of my life. “Let not your heart be troubled, trust in God, trust also in Me.”

If you would like to see how I learnt to deal with and overcome anxiety and anxious thoughts, here are two of my earlier blog posts that deal with those issues.

Breaking the Fear Cycle

Dealing with Fearful Thoughts

Praise our loving Heavenly Father for giving us a High Priest who can sympathise with us and comfort us in such difficult times.

Hebrews 4:14-16 ‘Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathise with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.’

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(All verses from the NIV)

Recession Blues

We need only read the paper, watch TV, or see internet news updates, and we will be bombarded with doom and gloom predications that “Recession is coming!” or, “Recession is here!” and of course, “World heading for global depression!”

The fact is that some countries are already suffering the effects of recession, with rising inflation, higher unemployment, and an increase in the number of the homeless. My wife has shared with me the troubles that many families are experiencing in Japan now. Since company provided housing is often part of the job package, when a father is retrenched, they lose not only their income but their home as well.

Many fear that the world is in danger of slipping into another depression akin to the Great Depression of the late 1920s and early 1930s. Many factors that brought about the Great Depression are at work in today’s global economy, such as distress selling, banks in serious financial straights, falling asset prices, lower profits, falling interest rates, soaring unemployment, and so on.

What attitude should we take towards the threat of national/global recession and depression? Should we live in fear of their arrival, dreading how recession or depression will affect us personally? Should we allow fears of what may come tomorrow destroy our ability to live today?

Jesus told us not to worry.

“…do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:31 – 34.

So we should live today with the strength that God gives us today. Worrying about tomorrow not only destroys our ability to enjoy and cope with today, but it doubts God’s ability to look after our future.

And when 'tomorrow' comes, should it arrive hand in hand with calamity, what should our attitude be? What if national or global recession/depression deprives us of jobs, shares, investments, even our homes and possessions?

The answer is that we must seek first the kingdom of God and then trust Him to meet all of our needs.

One of God’s names is Jehovah Jireh, which means, the ‘Lord will provide.’ So Abraham called that place The LORD Will Provide. And to this day it is said, "On the mountain of the LORD it will be provided." Genesis 22:14.

I am convinced that as we put God first and present our requests to Him, we will be astounded by the miracles of His wondrous provision.

Philippians 4:19 And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

God knows what we need - we have nothing to fear.

Matthew 6:25 – 34 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

There is a running joke in my family. If we receive a tax bonus or a cash windfall for a certain amount, we often get a bill the next day for that same amount.

It is my personal opinion that one of the primary ways God will provide for the needs of His children during recession/depression is through the body of Christ. These trials are an opportunity for Christians to watch out for each other’s needs, so that those with plenty can help those in need, just as in the early church. Let us each be mindful of the needs of our Christian family, especially those of our local church.

Acts 4:32-35 All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had. With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and much grace was upon them all. There were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned lands or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to anyone as he had need.

Please note that there is a difference between God supplying all of our needs and God maintaining our wealth or current/previous life style. Our riches are those things we have stored in heaven – our relationship with God, our salvation, each soul we have lead to Christ, every good work we have done for God.

What attitudes should we have if such trials as recession/depression destroy our previous lifestyle? Let examine the life of the Apostle Paul, who set us a great example through the many trials he endured.

2 Corinthians 11:23-27 I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely, and been exposed to death again and again. Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked.

How did Paul respond to these trials? Did he worry, grumble, or blame God?

No, he relied upon Christ’s strength instead of upon his own. 2 Corinthians 12:9 Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

He learned to be content whatever his circumstances.

Philippians 4:12-13 ‘I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.’

In fact, he went further than being content. In the Book of Acts, we even find him singing and praising God while in prison!

Acts 16:24-25 Upon receiving such orders, he put them in the inner cell and fastened their feet in the stocks. About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them.

How was Paul able to respond like this? It was because his hope was securely and firmly in Christ, not in this world or its riches, material possessions, stock markets, job, or house.

1 Thessalonians 1:3 We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.

Paul also fixed his hope upon the riches he would receive in Christ when he died and went to heaven.

1 Peter 1:13 Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Further more, Paul considered the unimaginable, eternal riches that await us in heaven, and compared to these, the temporary trials we endure on the earth faded into insignificance.

Romans 8:17-18 Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory. I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.

I think of my ill health in the same way. Hearing impaired, bad tinnitus, epilepsy, slipped spinal discs, difficulty swallowing – when examined in their own light, these troubles could weigh me down. And yes, I know God can and does heal, and I have sought such healings. However, if He never heals me of these ailments, I am not troubled. Why?

Because my hope is in Christ - I know that my time in this world is temporary. I am only passing through on my way to heaven to be with Christ, my Lord and Saviour. And when I get to heaven, I will receive a brand-new, resurrection body – perfect in every way, just like Christ’s resurrected body. I will have this new body for eternity.

If you are reading this article and you have not accepted Jesus Christ to be your Lord and Saviour, let me encourage you to take that step now. Pop over to my blog’s right-hand side bar, scroll down and you will see a heading “Becoming Part of God’s family.” Follow the instructions given by these Bible verses and you will begin your new life as a born-again Christian.

Our life in this world is temporary, and without God, has no meaning, as the Bible shows us in Ecclesiastes 1:2.

"Meaningless! Meaningless!"
says the Teacher.
"Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless."

But for those with faith in Christ, our lives have meaning, significance and purpose.

Those who belong to God’s family have a wondrous hope – that one day we shall spend eternity in heaven, where we can see the face of God and Jesus everyday, a perfect place filled with love, joy and peace.

So if recession/depression deprives us of our job, shares, investments, home or possessions, let us remember to keep things in perspective. This is temporary, Christ is our hope, and glory awaits us. And our God shall supply all of our needs.

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(All verses from the NIV.)

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