Who Am I?

Depression tends to leave a trail of destruction in its wake. One of its victims is a positive self-concept - our sense of significance and self-worth. We look at sorry state of our lives, and compare ourselves to what we used to be like and what we want to be like, and often feel worthless.

Part of the process of recovering from depression is rediscovering our worth and learning to have a positive self-concept again.

I remember going through this process back in 1992. The worst phase of depression was behind me, and I was living close to a normal life, although still afflicted by strong fatigue and panic attacks. When I examine my diary entries from 1992, I can see that Jesus was teaching me once again how much I meant to Him, that I was His treasure, His beloved. Only when we understand our significance to God, and how He views us, can we really understand our true worth.

This is something I wrote in my diary after I had gone on a prayer walk one night on 7th August 1992.

Who Am I?
I love to walk alone at night,
And gaze up at all the heavens,
Bright stars twinkling in the night sky,
While a gentle, cold breeze refreshes my soul.
And while I look up at the great expanse above me,
I wonder, "Who am I, Lord, that You care for me?"
I am so tiny, so little, such a tiny part of Your creation,
I am dwarfed to insignificance compared to the heavens.
Yet You care for me. You tell me that You treasure me.
You hold me in Your hands and delight in me - even tiny little me.
I am precious to You, the Great God who created all.
You who fills this wondrous night sky,
Have fixed Your attention on me.
And You love me so much
That You died for me.
Jesus, I love You.

We see King David, who shared his experiences with depression in the Psalms, reflecting on the very same topic – his value in God’s sight.

Psalm 8
O LORD, our Lord,
how majestic is your name in all the earth!
You have set your glory
above the heavens.
From the lips of children and infants
you have ordained praise
because of your enemies,
to silence the foe and the avenger.
When I consider your heavens,
the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars,
which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
the son of man that you care for him?
You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings
and crowned him with glory and honor.
You made him ruler over the works of your hands;
you put everything under his feet:
all flocks and herds,
and the beasts of the field,
the birds of the air,
and the fish of the sea,
all that swim the paths of the seas.
O LORD, our Lord,
how majestic is your name in all the earth!

If recovering from depression, let us sit at Jesus’ feet and wait upon Him, and reflect and meditate upon the amazing way in which our loving Lord and Saviour thinks of us. Although we appear to be insignificant when compared to the grandeur of God's creation, let us join with David in rejoicing that God has crowned us with glory and honor - He created us in His image. Moreover, when we placed our faith in Christ, He clothed us with His robes of righteousness and gave us the right to become children of God. We are special, we are significant, we have value.

Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God— children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God. John 1:12-13

All verses from the NIV.